breathing

I've been on a bit of a hiatus the past couple of weeks... it seems that no matter how hard I try to establish some sort of routine, my life just isn't equipped to handle it.

Last weekend I went to Winston Salem to celebrate the marriage of two of my very close, wonderful friends, Shannon and Madison. It was a magnificent get-a-way... the leaves were just beginning to change, the weather was crisp, the people were wonderful, hospitable and gracious, the ceremony was just gorgeous and the reception was a blast. Congratulations Shannon and Madi- I wish you all the best in your life together!

This weekend was spent in Richmond supporting the opening of a new REI in Shortpump. Scott built bikes while I wandered around shop-opolous. It was INSANE! Think Southpoint Mall + Brier Creek and then spice it up with oh maybe two dozen more restaurants! It was a little scary. I sat in on some of the SST, Sales and Service Training, which is something that all new hires go through. Now, I've been with REI for two years now and most of the glamor, glory and glitz has worn off. I KNOW SST, but man, sitting in on the training was awesome. After the reality of retail sets in a bit more, the responsibilities, expectations and understanding has quadrupled... to sit in with a brand new staff of people that are getting ready to open a brand new store, it was inspiring. It reminded me that REI IS a different sort of company and I am grateful to be a part of that, and while maybe our store is made up of a bunch of old dogs, having worked there from 2-13 years, it is still a pretty spectacular work environment.

Life post-college isn't turning out like I thought, money is tight, doors aren't opening left and right... so all the deep breaths and reminders I can get seem to be paying off double. We're a generation of "go to college and get a job" but we graduated in a time of economic panic. And it's so easy to feed into that energy, to wake up each day anxious about what you're going to do, how you're going to do and if you'll even be able to do... but I just have to keep reminding myself that that's not what life is about! Sure, we all want more money and we all want to be more successful. But do we NEED it? What would happen if we let go of all of our preconceived notions? Let go of what we think life is and what we think life should be? Could we be happier? More content? More balanced? More at peace? If we could learn to live more simply, and accept that we are good enough as we are, and the fact that we don't live in a fancy house and drive a nice car is not a reflection of who we are...that is my quest. Not to settle for less, never to settle for less, but to seek out peace over prosperity and appreciate what I have now rather than spending my entire day envying what others have. And to remind myself that it is ok to want things, it is good! But that does not mean that I need to have them today. So often I feel that I am entitled to the things that I want, but I am not.

There is something beautiful about where I am today and acknowledging that in no way means that I will spend eternity here. The days are overwhelming, but rather than rocking the boat trying to stir up change, or maybe hiding from it, I am going to choose to breath. And sometimes it's breathing that takes my breath away, but that's ok, because the future only comes one day at a time.